She's too far

Sick!
didn't go work today...
whole day rest at home eat medicine...
tml wun be going to work also...
not yet recover.

i keep dreaming of my grandma...
guess i miss her too much...

i realize after i go gym,
i eat more!!!
and it's like no matter wat i eat i m not at all full...haha
faint!

my time twisted again
nv reach 5am i cant get to sleep
how?
what should i do?
i need to work...
like this i'm damn tired but i just can't sleep even sick also same
haix...

I thought i survived after that sms,
forcing myself just to ignore...
it's been quite long and i reali thought she's gone...
But...
she suddenly msn me,
i dunno to reply or not to...
if reply wat should i say?
it reali make me think...
it's too late...
she will never change...
and it's hard for me...
thou she's a nice girl...
but part of her i just dun understand and dun get it...
y she doing this?
we came so far but yet she can be shaken so easily...
she just dun love me...
no she dun...
i dun mean a thing to u...
just rememeber this.
i am trying real hard to ignore...
as i dun deny i do think of her sometime...
we can be very xin fu...
but she choosen her freedom to love someone else or rather love herself more den to share the paradise with me...
now it's over...

*When i convinced myself that she is gone,she came back and confuse my mind