Yesterday

I guess this is the longest entry for so long.
editing my entry here...still fresh this entry so dun wish to start a new entry so continue from this entry.
just got home.
tired....very...not sober just now but now alrit already...
i should say i love her...n now i hate her...
i nv admit before the feeling coz i not sure but i guess now the feeling should be love...
well...anyway .... for the time being i should stop seeing her...everything is not fine...
n i reali dun wish to see her animore...no no no...
i start to feel helpless n nonsense...she's rit n m wrong...
hahahahahhaaha....i got nothing more to say...numb....m always wrong....i dun see myself rit...i hate it...
i nv say u always happy u got no problem...
wat about me????
hahahaha....i got no problem yar i m happy all the way...as if...
as if...................................................... .....
i'm so lost with all the things u said n done to me...
i rather dunno anything about u from the beginnning....i rather dunno.
m weak i am...nv denied...

our fate never end...god dun allow it to...
recklessly i went to find her...n i was thinkin if i missed her den forget about it...but can u believe that i actually bump into her the next min i reach her place...why?i was amazed....we leave at different time...n shouldn't be....but many time do she know that many time...i bump into her...sometime i din go up to her...i just watch her go...i always believe in fate...so i believe too much in us....too engross....again n again chances chances n chances...god i think it's the end...
i going to destroy the fate with my barehand just to stop the pain.i will purposely avoid her....no more fate no more.....i love u but now it vs i hate u-end

doc say that my ********** is seriously infected,and now it affecting my voice box...if i didn't take good care of it i might even become REALI dumb for all my life...hahahaha...be it...i nv know how to tak gd care of my health i know...
sorry to make my mum n dad so worry about me...

i should give someone else the chance to love me...she told me...perhaps i should...i shouldn't run around the circle again n again...she's gone...she never be back again...startin anew...not at all feelin any guilt...i love god still...

On thrus i cried myself to sleep...
thought of my grandma...
the pain,cldn't describe.so upset.
she worth much more than every tears i drop...

yesterday i saw quite a few ppl feeling down.
i dun show my pain out to ppl...
except my close ones.
she is very upset cause of the road she chosen.
u have to affirm your choice.
you do have a choice as for now.
dun leave urself to the road of non-return.
just think carefully what u really want.
no matter wat you do,you urself must be happy.
as for them...
qurrel for nothing,
in the end still ok.haha
cry for nothing also...
both cry infront of me..
i know i know...
but really small issue...~chill guys.

we are worse than strangers now...

life is all about giving and taking..
i learn about this...
i can give more but take less...or take nothing
i dun mind as long as i do my best as what i should.
sometime i may appear as a fool..
i dun care wat others think as long as success in my hand...who cares?

i need a break seriously...
i'm too tired...
i going to lose my way soon...
n god guide me home pls.... ... . .. .. ...

******* Don't hide from me anymore, show your face. i will love u to the end.

**** I m still here , never leave.

** Please give me more power to survive.

This song is very meaningful...describe how i feel...

谁的心飘在空中
你再也不想多说
擦去泪我没有一点保留
天知道可否能有任何请求

即使我的心如刀割
你已不再爱我
任凭我这么痛
你却无动于衷
我就快要发疯
我的爱已失控 oh no
无可救药的我只能忍着痛

你已经不再爱我
连话都不想多说
看着你我比谁都还难过
希望他可以给你更多更多

束手无策的我只能低下头
悔不当初的我不愿意放手